


Digital Devil Story IF

by lorddoofenshmertz



Category: Shin Megami Tensei Series
Genre: F/M, What-If
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2015-10-26
Packaged: 2018-04-26 06:40:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4994134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lorddoofenshmertz/pseuds/lorddoofenshmertz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An alternate recounting of the events of Aya Nishitani's Digital Devil Story novels.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, so this will be my second story posted on this site, and the first one dealing with the Shin Megami Tensei series. However, I am going WAYYY back in time towards the very beginnings of the franchise. You may not know this, but the series actually started out as an adaptation of a novel series known as Digital Devil Story published in the '80s, only the first two volumes of which have been fan-translated. So I'm basically throwing in an SMT-style protagonist in there to shake the plot up, and re-framing the novel's original protagonists as Law and Chaos avatars. The archive warnings won't really apply to the beginning stages of the story I'm posting right now, but as the DDS novels tend to go into really graphic territory, so will my story, in all likelihood. Enjoy!

"Halt!" said the commanding voice, stopping the man in his tracks.

"You cannot follow this path any further unless you know yourself. But the first frame of reference to knowing yourself is understanding how others see you. So what does the world call you? What is your name?"

Reiji Otonashi spoke his name, and the wall before him disappeared.

As he moved forward, seemingly in a trance, he discovered another man before him, a man who seemed anguished, infuriated.

"This world is full of vermin." he spat out, hatred and contempt coloring his every word. "Human pieces of garbage who think the people around them are theirs to do with as they please. I'll show them."

The man approached Reiji.

"I'll restore order to this world. I'll crush the malevolent insects we've been cursed with. Once the unruly ones of civilization have been dealt with, humanity will know true peace and happiness. My name is Nakajima Akemi, and I am pleased to make your acquaintance."

Reiji quietly walked ahead, feeling possessed by a force much greater than his own. Soon enough, he discovered a woman before him. Nakajima froze with a start; he looked as though he knew who she was.

However, Nakajima remained silent as the woman approached Reiji.

"True beauty lies in freedom." she said. "The freedom to make your own choices, the freedom to shape your future, the freedom to choose and influence your friends. Freedom is the essence of innocence. The knowledge that I can change my life, and my world however I want, is the most treasured possession I have."

She broke into a wide smile. "My name is Shirasagi Yumiko. I hope you appreciate the wonders of true freedom as I do."

Reiji walked on ahead, opening the door in front of him.

"Ah, it seems our guests are finally here, Narukawa." said an elderly man, as he looked at Reiji. Unlike Nakajima and Shirasagi, he was clearly a Caucasian, though Narukawa, the man accompanying him, looked to be of Japanese ethnicity himself.

"I have a feeling fate has quite the test for all of us here." the man said. "My name is Charles Feed, and you already heard me mention Mr Narukawa over here. We'll be seeing each other soon enough, I am sure of it."

Reiji could see something else ahead of him. A woman was in the arms of someone. She seemed hypnotized, and madly in love. And that someone who was cradling her, was it...?

"Reiji! Reiji, wake up! You've got school today!" he heard his mother say.

Reiji got up with a start. That's right, today was the first day he was going to attend Jusho High, a school he'd been hurriedly enrolled into after his parents transferred to Tokyo. The timing of this shift hadn't sat particularly well with Reiji; aside from being forced to part with the friends he had back at Osaka, his preparations for the college entrance exams had also been disrupted. However, Reiji had always been a bit of a slacker, so it's not as if the shift was proving to be  _too_  disruptive.

But regardless, now that he had enrolled into Jusho High, the only thing he could do was get on with attending his classes and hope for the best.

He quietly heated up and ate his porridge, and bid his mother adieu with a monotone "I'm going now, bye." before heading out.

His walk to the Jusho High campus passed by uneventfully, the hustle and bustle of the surrounding city coming of as rather unremarkable and boring to him. He didn't expect his school life to be much different. Most teachers had a tendency to emphasize rote learning and testing over any actual engagement with whatever they were teaching, and students were often too preoccupied with their own troubles to form any meaningful bonds with each other. So be it, Reiji thought. It was the way things worked, and it couldn't be helped.

However, soon after stepping inside the gates, one of the girls caught his eye.

She was a pretty girl, with a slender frame and a cute face that looked rather bewildered by its surroundings. Reiji had always found himself naturally drawn to girls like these. It was clear that this girl was unfamiliar with her surroundings, which made her, consciously or not, desperate for some guidance. And this desperation was what, in Reiji's experience, made people more approachable.

Reiji was never one to pass up an opportunity to get close to an attractive girl, and his former friends had noticed his knack for drawing women towards him without coming off as too much of a Casanova. But this girl in particular stirred something inside of him. He was convinced that he'd met her before, and that it was imperative he keep himself close to her.

Deciding to follow his impulse, he wore a friendly, welcoming smile as he walked towards her.

"Hello!" he said. "You look a little lost."

"Oh!" she said, taken aback. She promptly relaxed after getting a good look at Reiji, and replied "Yeah, I suppose I am! I'm new here, actually."

"Oh? So am I! My name's Reiji Otonashi. Pleasure to meet you."

Reiji extended his hand.

"Oh, uh, I'm Shirasagi. Shirasagi Yumiko." the girl said, and shook his hand. "It's nice to know I'm not the only outsider here." she continued with a chuckle.

"Yeah, same here." Reiji replied, pleased that things had started off on the right foot. "So what class are you in?"

"Senior Year, the gifted section."

"Oh!" Shirasagi replied. "I'm in that class too. What a coincidence!"

Reiji felt absolutely elated, and strangely relieved to discover that he and Yumiko would be sharing the same classroom. Instinctively, he decided to stay as close as he possibly could to her.

"Oh." she said, as the courtyard bell rang. "I suppose classes are about to begin now."

"Yeah." Reiji replied. "Shall we go, then?"

The two walked side by side towards their assigned classroom. There, they found their homeroom teacher, a shapely and pretty woman, waiting for them.

"Ah, so you two must be the new arrivals!" she said with a polite smile. "I'm Ohara-sensei, your homeroom and classical Japanese teacher." she then turned over to the class. "These new transfer students are Shirasagi Yumiko and Reiji Otonashi. I hope you treat them well and get along."

Shirasagi and Reiji went around introducing themselves to the other classmates, most of whom responded by introducing themselves with cold politeness. Two introductions stood out to Reiji. The first was a girl named Kano Miyuki, who was warmer to them than the rest of the students, and seemed to have taken a particular shine to Shirasagi.

The other was Nakajima Akemi. Ironically, his introduction stood out because it was the most curt and cold out of all of them. He simply mentioned his name once, and told Reiji and Shirasagi to take their seats, as though he was the teacher of the class instead of Ohara.

However, there was another reason Nakajima stood out to Reiji. Reiji couldn't help but suspect they'd met before, just as he'd suspected with Yumiko. Also, just like he did with Yumiko, Reiji felt the need to stick close to Nakajima and keep an eye on him.

However, unlike Yumiko, Nakajima wasn't anywhere near as friendly, and Reiji was fearful of annoying him, instinctively knowing that the consequences of doing so would be severe. So he let Nakajima be, and guided Yumiko to an empty bench where the two of them could sit together.

However, the tension he'd felt after meeting Nakajima soon gave way to boredom once Ohara-sensei began her lecture. Just as he'd suspected, it was a lifeless, dull recounting of some stupid Japanese poem that he'd forget about immediately after giving his exams. At least she was being to the point by pointing out what questions would be asked in the exams.

His eyes darted toward Yumiko, who looked even more put off than he was. In fact, she looked borderline  _offended._

None of the other students seemed to be doing anything other than taking notes. Even Nakajima was idly typing away on his handheld computer.

Wait. What was he doing on his computer during a classical Japanese class?

Unable to contain his curiosity, Reiji craned his head over to get a better look at the computer's display screen.

Nope. There was no way Nakajima was paying any attention to the lecture. The display on his computer was completely incomprehensible, and made Reiji a little uneasy.

However, he decided to turn his attention back to Ohara-sensei before she noticed him, and didn't try to snoop on Nakajima for the rest of the day.

Instead, he decided to ask his classmates about whether or not they had any idea regarding what he was doing. Their near-uniform evasiveness to his questions only made Reiji more uncomfortable.

Deciding to confide his suspicions in Yumiko, he offered to walk her home. After a bit of coaxing, she agreed.

"So, that Nakajima fellow was acting rather weird today, huh?" Reiji said as they walked, trying to sound as casual as possible.

"Oh!" Yumiko replied with a start, and stopped to look at him. Reiji could sense the relief coloring her face; it was clear that she'd been thinking about him too.

"So you noticed it too, Reiji?"

"Yeah, I did." he replied, dropping his relaxed facade. "He doesn't seem to be paying attention in class at all. It's like he's on his own trip, typing away in that handheld computer of his. And the fact that everyone, including the teachers just leave him be like that...it's suspicious. Very suspicious."

"Hmm, you're right. Something's definitely up with him. In fact, I get the feeling that he has more authority over this school than the teachers. We need to do something about this."

"What?!" Reiji blurted out, surprised by Yumiko's suggestion.

"Look, we can't just hide away our suspicions about this and act like nothing's wrong. If Nakajima really does have the entire class under his thumb, if they're that devoted to him, it isn't right. Nobody should hold that kind of power over those around him, wouldn't you agree?"

"You have a point, but there will be consequences to interfering with him. If our suspicions are accurate, Nakajima could set the entire class upon us if he's feeling threatened."

"Then we'll just need to be careful." Yumiko said, and took out a notebook from her backpack.

"Here." she said. "Give me your number. We need to make a plan."

Reiji pondered over her suggestion for a moment, wondering if prying into someone else's affairs like this was a good idea. Deciding to go along with Shirasagi's suggestion for the moment, he went ahead and wrote down his number on the notebook.

"Okay, and here's my number." Yumiko said, writing on another page and then tearing it out. "Feel free to call me anytime."

"I see." Reiji said, and soon afterwards, they arrived at the gates of Yumiko's home, a three-story corporate dormitory.

"This is where we part ways." Yumiko said. "I'll call you in the evening, and then we can discuss how to deal with Nakajima."

"Okay, then." Reiji said, and shook her hand. "Bye bye, Yumiko."

As he turned away from her and headed towards his own home, Reiji couldn't help but feel amazed at just how eventful his first day at school had turned out.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Time passed slowly for Reiji once he made it home. After brushing off his mother’s concerns regarding how his day had gone, he did little more than watch TV and wait for Shirasagi to call him. His mother didn’t talk much to him; Reiji had always been the quiet type as far as his parents were concerned, and had assured his mother that his day had passed uneventfully.

Soon afterwards, the call from Yumiko came. Reiji had been fortunate enough to be allowed a landline connection within his own room, so he was able to freely discuss things with Shirasagi without worrying about his mother listening in. To his amusement, he noticed that Yumiko herself didn’t have the same luxury.

“You’re sure you want to talk to him directly?” Reiji said.

“Yeah. I mean, we’ll act all casual, just ask him what he keeps programming. Hopefully we won’t set him off.”

“Hopefully?”

“Relax, Reiji. I’m sure Nakajima-kun won’t fly into a rage over being asked a simple question. In fact, it would be rather weird, even to him, if we pretended not to notice what he does in class, don’t you think?”

“I don’t think he cares about our behavior, Yumiko. The way I see it, he’d only be too happy if everyone cowered in fear of him.”

“Yeah, he does give off that vibe, doesn’t he? Regardless, I don’t think approaching him should blow up in our faces.”

“Okay, then Shirasagi. We’ll speak to Nakajima tomorrow.” Reiji said, after wishing each other goodnight, the two hung up their phones.

That night, Reiji slowly drifted off into his dreams, wondering what he’d learn about the mysterious Nakajima Akemi the next day.

“Are you sure about this?” spoke a light to Reiji. It was a blinding light, its brightness completely enveloping his surroundings. Reiji couldn’t even see his shadow, though logic would dictate that a rather sharp shadow would’ve formed in the presence of such a bright light.

“You foolish human!” screamed the light, startling Reiji. However, he maintained his stoic exterior and stared right back at the light.

“Such a strong will.” said the light. “Do you have any idea what your will has done to the world, human? It’s resulted in nothing more than death, pain and destruction. The only way your poisonous nature was mitigated was by us. We taught you the meaning of peace, the value of structure, the importance of surrendering your will for the greater whole. But these days, your society has become far too accommodating towards your freedom. But you know as well as we do that all that’s about to change.”

“Nakajima!” said Reiji out loud.

A roaring laughter emanated from the light. “Yes. Izanagi has suffered long enough thanks to the will of his fellow men. His actions shall pave the way for us to correct the direction humanity is taking. Just abide by our plans, and you will have nothing to worry about in the future.”

“I…I…”

“You don’t really buy what they’re saying, do you?” spoke a woman’s voice.

“Yumiko?”

“That’s right. In this era, I am known as Shirasagi Yumiko. But back when Japan as we know it was created, I bore the name of Izanami. And I have suffered a great deal due to the structure the Gods sought to impose upon me and my beloved.”

As the figure came closer to Reiji, all doubt vanished from his mind. He was indeed speaking to Shirasagi Yumiko.

“The Gods are nothing more than illusionists, demanding worship and submission for the promise of keeping you all safe. In the end, they are no different from demons. They just choose to manipulate your will so that they can control you.”

“No…Izanami…no…” was that Nakajima again?

“Are you still running away from the truth? Did you not give in to your own demonic nature when you refused to leave me for the dead? Tell me, if your devotion to God was so absolute, why did you come for me? Why didn’t you leave me in Yomi?”

“I…”

“And it isn’t as though your devotion to me was absolute either. When you saw what the world of the dead had done to me, you ran away in fear! Because that is how all life is, human or otherwise. We are all nothing more than our impulses, and the only thing that can control our impulses is our will.”

Yumiko then turned to Reiji, looking him squarely in the eye. “Accepting this truth is the only way you will have any control over your future. The only factor that decides how you will shape your life and the world around you is your own will. And you must strengthen your will so that it can rise above the wills of those who are in conflict with you. Life is an eternal war where we do everything we can to preserve our lives and our wills. Soon, the entire world will awaken to this truth, and when it does, only those whose wills shine the brightest will survive. I wish you the best of luck.”

“But, but what if I don’t want to be on my own?” Reiji said. “What if I don’t want conflict?”

“Then you are seeking that which does not exist. Conflict and chaos are inevitable.” Yumiko then smiled, putting her hand on Reiji’s cheek. “Of course, if it is companionship you desire, you can seek out those who desire it themselves. The will of the one you seek, and the will of you, will determine the rest. But do not fool yourself into thinking that your companionship can last forever. Your will is always being tested, and before your own body fails to sustain you, you must pass it on. That is the only way any part of you can survive in this world.”

“Yumiko,” Reiji said, “I want…” he wanted her. He could brave anything; accept any adversity, if he had her by his side. That is what Reiji wanted to say.

“Is that devotion we hear in your voice, Reiji?” it was the light again. “Do you feel a deep, inexorable attraction to Shirasagi? Do you want her to guide you, protect you, and fill your days will happiness and pleasure?”

“Yes.” Reiji said.

“Then you’ve just explained why our presence is needed in this world. We protect and serve humanity because they too are in love with us. They too are devoted to us. You know as well as we do that no living being is capable of shouldering their lives alone. They need the guidance, the love and protection of others to survive. All we wish to do is spread our love and protection to every soul on this planet. If everyone can be sustained, if everyone can be fulfilled, isn’t following our direction worth it?”

“You do not speak for everyone!” Shirasagi screamed.

“But you said it yourself, did you not?” Nakajima came forward, and it became clear to Reiji that the light was emanating from within him. “Life is an eternal war of will. Those that submit to our will shall live their entire lives in bliss and joy. Those who refuse shall be destroyed. If all who oppose us are gone, there shall be no more conflict, or chaos.”

“No! I can’t let you win, not after what you did to me!”

“So you would let your petty grudges stand in the way of the paradise we’re building? There is no place for you in our new world!”

“NO!” Reiji screamed, throwing himself in between Nakajima and Shirasagi.

“So that is the choice you’ve made.” Nakajima said, with a vicious smirk. “In order to protect the woman you so foolishly love, you’re willing to damn everyone we’re trying to save with our paradise? Have your own base urges blinded you so completely to what’s truly important?”

“No, it isn’t that…! There…there has to be another way!” Reiji spoke, holding back his tears the best that he could. He didn’t want to lose either of them. He didn’t want them to fight. He’d give anything, _anything_ , to stop them from hurting each other. He wanted nothing more than to go back to the world where they all lived together, like the beautiful family they once were.

Family? That’s strange. He’d never thought of them as family before.

“I understand what you’re trying to say, you know.” he heard another voice say.

Looking around, he saw that Nakajima and Yumiko had disappeared.

In their place was the Caucasian Reiji remembered from his prior dream.

“Charles…?”

“Yes.” the man replied. “I suppose I too have a role in deciding the fate of the world, though I have reason to believe you’re the one with the final say in how things will go. Those two are quite a pair, aren’t they?”

“You mean…Nakajima and Yumiko?”

“Yes. I can see that you care deeply about them. You weren’t happy seeing how they got at each other’s throats, were you?”

“No, of course not! I don’t want them to be hurt. I…I love them.”

“They’re like family to you, aren’t they?”

“Yes. Yes they are.”

“Well, I’ve had plenty of experience dealing with family disputes of my own, you know. Would you mind listening to my advice?”

“No, I suppose not.”

“Family members can be a very headstrong bunch. They prattle out their words of wisdom to you, being completely convinced that they’re in the right. When you’re young and naïve, you don’t even have the guts to question them. It’s only when you grow older and move beyond their influence that you realize just how flawed everything they told you was, and you end up a deeply flawed person yourself as a result. But then again, it isn’t like anyone outside your own family knows any better either. At least your family’s trying to do right by you; others aren’t always that well-intentioned.”

“Is that why Nakajima and Yumiko confronted each other? They were trying to protect me?”

“Yeah. They have their own ideas about what the truth of this world is, and because they were in conflict, they turned on each other. I don’t think they would have been so aggressive if they weren’t trying to help you.”

“Do they…think of me as family too?”

“That would be my guess, though I don’t know if they themselves are consciously aware of that. But regardless, you now know how they perceive the world. And when the time comes for you to decide the future of this planet, you'll have an idea of what directions they may try to pull you in. But do you want to know what I think?”

“I do.”

“I think that they are both trying to twist the world they see in order to fit their own preconceived ideals. It seems to be human nature, even divine nature, to give in to this temptation. The way I see it, the world is far too vast and complicated for any of us to truly understand it. I do not believe that there is any fundamental truth that can explain away the nature of life. The only thing we can do is adapt on the basis of the evidence before us.”

“So is that the world I should create? A world where humanity either adapts to its environment or dies?”

“Presenting your fellow men with just these two options is being rather cruel, don’t you think? But then again, I can’t exactly advocate surrendering everyone’s destiny to a higher power, given that I’ve just said that no one truly understands this world. No, I suppose the best way to survive would be to both exercise your own will in understanding your surroundings, while at the same time carefully choosing who you can trust to compensate for the limitations of your own perception.”

“A world of balance. Where people both exercise their will and defer to the judgment of others. But to know what is the best option to take given the circumstances…”

“…is difficult, and often impossible. Which is why people like to take to extreme ideologies. They want all their questions answered, and they want a value system they can follow with an absolute conviction. If you so choose, you too can create such a world. But in my opinion, that would be a grave mistake.”

“I understand. Thank you, Professor.”

“Of course. I’m always happy to help. After all, this is my world too, and I want to carry on knowing that I’ve helped you make the right decision.”

 

“Reiji! Reiji, wake up!”


End file.
